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20 September 2010 @ 10:07 pm
fell too hard, too fast  
It seems my reaction time to distressing situations are delayed by 3 to 4 weeks. and I thought i could suppress my feelings forever but sadly, i have yet to master the skill of emotional avoidance.

So now I feel like a horrible person.

Odd to be on the other side of things, i've only encountered this vicariously through movies and tv shows.

That being said, i've gotten several comments including "i've never seen you this happy before" and "i've never seen you giddy. ever."

I took a huge risk and i'm going to ride it out. i am scared. because let me tell you, this has the potential of being the biggest disaster ever. as it was so eloquently put - a murder-fake suicide is going down if this ends.

but honestly, have you ever met someone and was willing to change everything just so your future could match theirs? i thought i was too hardcore for that lovey dovey bullshit.

kids? SURE, I'D LOVE SOME. GIVE ME A LITTER.
stay in hawaii forever? WHY CERTAINLY, I DON'T HATE IT HERE AT ALL.
be poor? OF COURSE, LOVE CONQUERS ALL, AMIRITE??


seriously, wtf is wrong with me? SERIOUSLY. i gotta snap out of this and quick. hopefully i will come out of this relatively unscathed but i doubt it. and i don't really want to come out of it, to be quite honest with you.
 
 
Current Mood: worriedworried